Monday, 9 February 2009

Sex and Feri

In the Feri tradition, which has been defined as a ‘sex-positive’ religion, sex is seen as a sacred and essential part of Self. While in other Witchcraft traditions there is an implicit sexual undercurrent, mostly expressed through outer polarity of male and female coven members or in the Great Rite (whether actual or ‘in token’), Feri makes it explicit. In regards to sex being an essential part of Self, there is a Feri saying from Victor: “Self is God and God is Self and God is a person like myself”. This saying emphasises the essential relationship between the worshipper and the Gods, which is ultimately sexual. Indeed, when we perform the Triple Soul Alignment we often feel a sexual rush to the genitals and a tingling in the toes and fingers.

In Feri, we have another saying “Everything begins with Sex”. This can be seen as a metaphor for the Divine impulse of creation, the first great Orgasm of the Star Goddess that brought forth the Multiverse, or it can be seen more mundanely as the act of sex between humans, animals, or plants. It can even be understood as Sex = Desire, and all things are done from a desire or a need, which therefore doesn’t limit it to a purely physical act.

So what is the purpose of sex? Is there one? In fact, I think there is more than one, and the meaning behind sex is unique for each sexual being. That being said, I don’t generally ascribe a meaning to sex. I think different sexual acts can have different significance, and the same act in a different situation would shift the meaning yet again. Yet most people would agree that sex is one of the most precious, sensual, special parts of being human. Even masturbation can be spiritually and physically nourishing, if done from the correct frame of mind.

Yet it is also dangerous. Sex can cause unwanted pregnancies and STI’s. When misused, it is rape and child abuse. To a lesser degree, it is using people through enforced prostitution. In the Iron Pentacle, Sex is connected to Power, and this relationship must be fully explored if the practitioner is to have a healthy sexual attitude.

I had sex last night. He is a friend of one of my close friends, and there was a definite sexual attraction when we met. We both knew we were going to have sex, yet we didn’t talk about it, hint at it, or think about the deeper meaning. And we enjoyed it immensely. We might see each other again, or we might not. What’s important is that two people came together (pun intended) and enjoyed the physicality of each other’s bodies, taking us out of our heads and grounding us.

Sex is love, embodied.


  1. Hi Mister

    What a great post (and a great blog)!

    Out of curiosity (it killed the cat I know...), could you expand on "Even masturbation can be spiritually and physically nourishing, if done from the correct frame of mind."

    From what frame of mind would you consider masturbation to be physically or spiritually un-nourishing?

    Hope you had a great birthday


  2. Hey Will...welcome to my blog!!

    I think that masturbation can be like any other pleasure - sometimes it can be used as a crutch or as a cheap thrill. I think that it can become addictive, because you get the physical pleasure without any emotional or spiritual involvement. This is great if balanced with a sex life that includes emotion and the spiritual (including spiritual or emotional masturbation!) but if it comes from a frame of mind of sticking on some porn and having a quick wank, then it's not the most fulfilling experience it could be. Although, this too is fine every now and then... ;-)

    And yeah, my birthday was really good cheers. You coming to the group next week?


  3. Sorry for the huge delay.....

    So that makes sense, perhaps it was the use of the word "Even" in the original passage that I was stuck on. I guess for me (and at the risk of sounding like a some kind of master wanker!) part of working through my issues with sex, and becoming sex positive, was/is realising the importance of masturbation. Any kind of sex with mySelf is sacred and nourishing, both Self sex during ritual and a quick wank, and everything in between. Its an emotional act of love and pleasure regardless of context. I've learnt what feels good for me and used this learning in sex with others and in sex with myself. Even when its not done in a delibrately sacred setting or frame of mind I'm still tapping into a tiny trickle from the unfathomable ocean of primal creation and enjoying one of the gifts of being alive. I also like to remind myself of the health benefits of masturbation; the endorphin release and the possible reduction of risk of cancer.

    Here ends my public serice announcement on masturbation :) I probably shared more of my personal feelings on the subject than you (and the blogsphere) ever wanted to hear! Glad you had a great birthday, look forward to catching up with you next month :)

  4. Hello, I really enjoy reading your blog ~ very accessable in sharing your enjoyment enthusiasm of your journey of rediscovery. I just wanted to add that I would highly recommend 'The Universe is a Green Dragon' by Brian Swimme. It is one of the most profound books I have read which speaks directly to what you have referred to in your post. :o)

  5. Leaf,

    I love your posts. I know this is old and you may not catch it but I'm glad to see someone considering relationships. Currently, I'm debating these same issues and I wanted to send you the blessings of kindred struggling in different time-spaces.

    As tribe, and as a friend -